Retirement

Well I think retirement is really close.  In some ways I can hardly wait and in other ways, I am scared poopless.  What scares me?  Well first of all will the money last?  Secondly, how will I take being home day after day? 

When I talk to my retired friends, they tell me they find they don't have enough time in the day to do all the things they want to do.  Somehow, I cant wrap my mind around that.  I am home for 5 days in a row and I start to go a bit stir crazy.  I am guessing they are finding other things to fill their days. 

The money?  Well I guess that will be what it will be.  I have lived with little before in my life, so I know how to do it.  It just isn't very much fun.

The next couple of months will determine,, when I retire.  I have been really restless about it.  I think once the final decision is made, I will be more at peace.  I sure hope so.  The one thing I know is that I have asked God to be in all this and lead and guide so I am trusting however it turns out, it is how he knows what is best for me and mine.

Memorial Day

I am feeling kinda down today.  I wish that we had gone somewhere or had planned on having someone over.  Well I tried, but our freinds couldnt make it  I havnt done much this weeknd.  I was home from work on Tursday sick and most of Friday I didnt feel the best.  Yesterday we took a trip to Ft. Snelling to put flowers on Gil's grave.  Today I just wish we were having a picnic.  We are going to meet some freinds for a late lunch tomorrow.  That is something.

Maybe we should all feel this way on this weekend. Somber and thankful for the men and women that have served and given thier lives in defense of our country.  That is the ultimate gift they can give to a nation. 

It has been quite a while since I have blogged.  This weekend I just feel like letting out feelings. 

I was upset wtih Jim this morning.  He spends 70% of his home time in front of his computer playing games or following the Tigers on line when they are playing games.  Really truely, I dont think he really wants to be married. He just wants a companion when he goes out to dinner or travels and he likes that he has someone to cook for him.  Know what?  I really dont need that, and I told him so this morning.  Wat is worse, feeling lonely when you are all alone or feeling lonely when you are with someone?